anneyonggg!
yes i haven't blog for like quite a while
i was expecting myself to be blogging during the so called holidays but lately, im really lazy.
im just here to drop by a few words
well, literally..haha
so what have i been doing this holiday?
same old same old i guess
having lunch with friends, going out with my baby <3, out jogging around my neighbourhood and just went to Miri
but,
this holiday, im done something "different" for the day.
that is..
going to BSRC and play badminton with my buds
honestly, im not quite a sporty girl
but i had no idea why this year..i found myself developing to it..?
i jog more than used too and finding myself wanting to play badminton
since i haven't played badminton for like the part 7years so my whole body was practically aching after that day
i cant wait for the school's badminton match somehow..HEHE
today is the officially last day of exams
tomorrow, lesssons will soon starts, papers are given and more homeworks are gonna be throwing up to us!
ohmy papers, I DONT EVEN WANNA LOOK AT IT.
i bound to fail my Physics, Chemist and POA.
can you believe it? POA.
bullshit.
well all the best tmrw.
BYE.
Sunday, March 27, 2011
Friday, March 4, 2011
frustrated.
i am certainly back on blogging all right
even if the exams are near
well, just wanna let out a few feelings.
even no one is willing to understand my feelings, but that doesnt mean i cant blogged about it right?
im human too okay
these days, let's just say i feel "quiet"
like, empty, silent..so far away from comfort.
i wont say why cause thats just..too obvious? i dont know.
i wanna feel cherished, easy, meaningful, sincerity, honesty, appreciated, important, special... and happy.
i'll be lying if i said i was truly happy right now
i feel..like im being pushed away
isnt it funny how when you're fully devoted to someone but yet you dont get treated the same way?
i once feel like im special, precious to somebody..
but now, everything seems so..blank?
no more fairytales
well maybe at first, i thought things were all like a dream
all too perfect, too wonderful that it all seems like a fake drama now
maybe its just me
maybe im being too sensitive
(that might be it? given that i having period right now. lol.)
but..come to think of it, it DOES seems like that
way back before
we're so sweet, so happy, so fully devoted
and i'll do anything to get that back
im not saying like..we're in hell wars now. no.
its just..i dont know
im confused now
i guess im just scared..
im scared that i have no one to hold onto me when im crying
im scared that i was no longer important to somebody
im scared that i mistake without even trying too
im scared that i am being fooled once again
im just scared..for not being able to feel love again
love is beautiful you know people
but..its just painful that you cant truly feel it's meaning
love has alot of meaning..simple word but tons of meaning
its the most wonderful things in the world
to me, love always means happiness to me
if you're happy, then you're loved..
like happy in a relationship
am i truly happy in a relationship?
yes.
i really am.
im being painfully honest
i dont lie.
but i just dont why unsincerity and insecurity must tag along
i just want to be happy...honest and true..
readers,
there's this person i really love.
honestly, i never felt this way before.
i feel love.. so beautiful that it brings me tears
im trying to forget all pains and just let things be with full sincerity and truth
cause, i just want that person in my life
no, i NEED that person in my life..
maybe i just miss him so much? too much?
maybe..i just miss us..
maybe, i just miss the moments in 2010
i know i shouldn't hold back memories and i know life goes on, but how can you just forget something that means so much to you right?
unless it means nothing to you, then yea, forget it.
well i probably shouldn't be thinking tha tmuch and feeling paranoid
my exams are coming, thats more important
and the fact that im so paranoid now is also because i witnessed an accident over at the highway this morning
it was my first experienced
the whole part, the crash, the broken vehicle
i saw, i heard, i SAW
and that scene where they crash, its still booming in my head
its scary
i pray that the people are alright
okay, bye.
even if the exams are near
well, just wanna let out a few feelings.
even no one is willing to understand my feelings, but that doesnt mean i cant blogged about it right?
im human too okay
these days, let's just say i feel "quiet"
like, empty, silent..so far away from comfort.
i wont say why cause thats just..too obvious? i dont know.
i wanna feel cherished, easy, meaningful, sincerity, honesty, appreciated, important, special... and happy.
i'll be lying if i said i was truly happy right now
i feel..like im being pushed away
isnt it funny how when you're fully devoted to someone but yet you dont get treated the same way?
i once feel like im special, precious to somebody..
but now, everything seems so..blank?
no more fairytales
well maybe at first, i thought things were all like a dream
all too perfect, too wonderful that it all seems like a fake drama now
maybe its just me
maybe im being too sensitive
(that might be it? given that i having period right now. lol.)
but..come to think of it, it DOES seems like that
way back before
we're so sweet, so happy, so fully devoted
and i'll do anything to get that back
im not saying like..we're in hell wars now. no.
its just..i dont know
im confused now
i guess im just scared..
im scared that i have no one to hold onto me when im crying
im scared that i was no longer important to somebody
im scared that i mistake without even trying too
im scared that i am being fooled once again
im just scared..for not being able to feel love again
love is beautiful you know people
but..its just painful that you cant truly feel it's meaning
love has alot of meaning..simple word but tons of meaning
its the most wonderful things in the world
to me, love always means happiness to me
if you're happy, then you're loved..
like happy in a relationship
am i truly happy in a relationship?
yes.
i really am.
im being painfully honest
i dont lie.
but i just dont why unsincerity and insecurity must tag along
i just want to be happy...honest and true..
readers,
there's this person i really love.
honestly, i never felt this way before.
i feel love.. so beautiful that it brings me tears
im trying to forget all pains and just let things be with full sincerity and truth
cause, i just want that person in my life
no, i NEED that person in my life..
maybe i just miss him so much? too much?
maybe..i just miss us..
maybe, i just miss the moments in 2010
i know i shouldn't hold back memories and i know life goes on, but how can you just forget something that means so much to you right?
unless it means nothing to you, then yea, forget it.
well i probably shouldn't be thinking tha tmuch and feeling paranoid
my exams are coming, thats more important
and the fact that im so paranoid now is also because i witnessed an accident over at the highway this morning
it was my first experienced
the whole part, the crash, the broken vehicle
i saw, i heard, i SAW
and that scene where they crash, its still booming in my head
its scary
i pray that the people are alright
okay, bye.
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